A married couple was asleep when the wife suddenly nudged her husband at 2 a.m.
“Wake up!”
The husband groaned.
“What now?”
“I think there’s a burglar downstairs.”
The husband rolled over.
“Call the police.”
Then he closed his eyes again.
A few minutes later, the wife shook him harder.
“Honey!”
“I heard footsteps!”
With a dramatic sigh, the husband climbed out of bed.
He pulled on his boxers.
Grabbed a baseball bat.
And marched downstairs.
He checked the kitchen.
Nothing.
The living room.
Nothing.
The dining room.
Nothing.
Finally he returned upstairs.
“Nobody’s there.”
The wife looked disappointed.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
The husband climbed back into bed.
Five minutes later, the wife shook him again.
“Honey!”
“Now I KNOW someone is downstairs!”
The husband sat up.
“What makes you so sure?”
The wife pointed toward the hallway.
“Because I heard the refrigerator door open.”
The husband rolled his eyes.
“Nobody breaks into a house for a midnight snack.”
Then he went back downstairs.
Again.
He searched every room.
Every closet.
Even behind the curtains.
Nothing.
Frustrated, he returned to bed.
“There’s nobody here.”
The wife finally settled down.
Morning came.
The husband woke first.
Still annoyed.
He headed to the kitchen for coffee.
Then stopped dead in his tracks.
A strange man was sitting at the table.
Calmly eating eggs and toast.
Using the family’s dishes.
Reading the newspaper.
The husband nearly dropped his coffee mug.
“WHO ARE YOU?!”
The stranger looked up.
“Oh, good morning.”
The husband grabbed the baseball bat.
“What are you doing in my house?”
The man shrugged.
“Having breakfast.”
The wife rushed into the kitchen.
One look at the stranger and she shouted:
“SEE?!”
“I TOLD YOU!”
The husband stared.
“You’re a burglar?”
The stranger nodded.
“Technically, yes.”
“Then why are you eating breakfast?”
The burglar smiled.
“Well, after watching you search the house twice…”
“And after realizing how safe I was…”
“I got hungry.”
The husband was speechless.
Finally he asked:
“Where were you hiding?”
The burglar laughed.
“In your basement.”
“We don’t have a basement.”
The burglar grinned.
“Exactly.”
Then he added:
“By the way, your wife is right far more often than you think.”
The wife folded her arms proudly.
The husband sighed.
“Of course she is.”
And according to the wife, that was the real lesson of the story. 😄
